Maayong Pasko!

Maayong Pasko ka ninyong tanan! Nanghinaot ko na magmalipayon mong tanan sa inyong pagsa-ulog sa pasko og bagong tuig!
Merry Christmas to everyone! Wishing all of you a joyful celebration of Christmas and New Year!

Presents from Green Santa

"enjoy the holidays and let's keep the green snowball going, rolling..."

green santa

High Priestess

You are The High Priestess

Science, Wisdom, Knowledge, Education.

The High Priestess is the card of knowledge, instinctual, supernatural, secret knowledge. She holds scrolls of arcane information that she might, or might not reveal to you. The moon crown on her head as well as the crescent by her foot indicates her willingness to illuminate what you otherwise might not see, reveal the secrets you need to know. The High Priestess is also associated with the moon however and can also indicate change or fluxuation, particularily when it comes to your moods.

What Tarot Card are You?
Take the Test to Find Out.

Leaving on Advent

Walking Away

Someday, in the midst of dividing planes
there will be stones waiting to be crushed
and after the painful ordeal of dividing and crushing,
you will be sleeping in caves
with the moon patiently guiding you.
I will only be watching you shiver and
there might be crows that will visit you.
Hold on! Nostalgic night will come and in your
memory I will be a deja vu—
eternal battle you will fight with bare hands.

(for him who hides in the tin box)

The Reader

Few months ago, I borrowed 'The Reader' by Bernhard Schlink from the University Library but I was not able to finish reading it for some very personal reasons...yesterday, i stumbled into the book again...and I can't resist reading it...it's hunting me with its eternal thoughts like:

"Sometimes the memory of happiness cannot stay true because it ended unhappily. Because happiness is only real when it lasts forever? Because things always end painfully if they contained pain, conscious or unconscious, all along?"

and there's more...

"From behind, she wrapped me in the towel from head to foot and rubbed me dry. Then she let the towel fall to the floor. I didn't dare move. I could feel her breast against my back and her stomach against my behind. She was naked too. She put her hands around me, one hand on my chest and other on my erection."

C-list Blogger!

With 11 links for the past 6 months, i'm now a C-list blogger.

The Middle Authority Group (10-99 blogs linking in the last 6 months)
This contrasts somewhat with the second group, which enjoys an average age not much older than the first at 260 days and which posts 50% more frequently than the first. There is a clear correlation between posting volume and Technorati authority ranking.

Find out what kind of blogger are you...

'stoke the embers of your passion'

The person who introduced Philippine poetry to me now blogs on the mission of his passion--poetry.

Painting Words

Moon Painted on Glass

Windows of filigree, framed
with intricately shaped galvanized
iron; ornamented with fleur de lis,
symbol for power and loyalty,
and curtains embroidered with
roses, of birthing and womanhood,
all loping in motions of fidelity.

The tempest moved on all directions
making waves that sent ripples
to the dwellers and spreading
the windows that emancipated
the phantom of the old dresser.

Pinned on a thick black blanket,
the docile moon posed for the
invisible painter to complete
the image stained on glass window.
And after his final stroke,
you closed the window
caressing the clear, cold glass.

On Being Queer...

The most pathetic question a person asked me: Are you gay? Nothing could be worst. I'm not gay; I'm just efeminate! Who in Silliman would think that I'm not gay?

If there is one person in the university who is sooo proud to be gay (aside from claudio), I think that would be me...

In Sir Ian's latest post, he mentioned something about ULAP, which I personally think is the main reason why I organized that event. And here it goes...

"That being gay and lesbian in our country has since then been dragged through the mud of prejudice in the ensuing years -- through the Spanish colonial period and the American colonial period -- is unforgivable, and poetry readings such as what we had and the like are instruments one can use to fight a tyranny of prejudice that do not belong to any person who thinks himself educated and enlightened...

According to Garcia, one should give these men a reprieve from the silence. Thus we celebrate "difference" now by holding poetry readings such as the one my students had in Silliman.


More...

We should have more.Haha!

REVIEW ON GERRY ALANGUILAN'S WASTED

To be honest, I don’t really read komiks or comics!
Wasted is probably the first komik book that I read up to that last page (it was required, anyway). I remember my classmates before in elementary exchanging issues of Archie, X-MEN and a lot more, but I didn’t care much about it. It was probably because of the way komiks are structured (the conversations printed in boxes or balloons, accompanying a scene); I just did not like it. Or maybe I just did not find superheroes that interesting. They were not my type. For the most part, I was just scanning through the pages and admiring the drawings, which I wished I could also do the same.

Wasted is the typical love story of a girl leaving the guy because of another guy. Then, the guy breaks down and does everything to win back the heart of the girl. But, it’s not the typical komiks. No journalist transforming into a superhero. No man being captured by apes and lived in a secluded area in the forest. No masculine figures helping people in the midst or trouble or distress. What is evident are images of man lying on the floor bathed with blood. Bodies exploding from glass windows and bullets coming out from the head accompanied with blood.
Eric, the main character, was a member of a band and was dumped by his girlfriend Jenny, who went with another guy. His life was devastated when jenny left him. Eric expressed his anger in the most extremes way—killing, murder and death. Anger management was not part of his vocabulary.
In the first chapter, he get annoyed with a born again preacher who went knocking on his door, telling him that it was the day that he’ll be saved from all his sins. He also strangled a man to death, who was smoking inside the jeepney. Other casualties include three gays, who verbally harassed him and a corrupt politician, who tried to negotiate with him.
These are not typical scenes in the komiks, which is said to be one of the cheapest means to get a good laugh. The term ‘komiks’ came from the English word comics, which is a 20th century form of art that emerged in the United States. Komiks can be distinguished from other forms of literature because of its: illustrated frames depicting a set of characters, actions read from left to right and balloons accompanying the actions of the characters.

Wasted was illustrated and written by Gerry Alanguilan, who is a licensed architect and graduated form the University of Santo Tomas. This Laguna-based artist ahs come along way after making the decision to pursue komiks over architecture, despite the admonitions of friend and family members. He became a komik book artist after being inspired by Whilce Portacio, who was at that time drawing the “X-MEN’ for Marvel Comics.
He has since them inked various komiks of many artists including Whilce Portacio, Leinil Francis Yu, Gilbert Monsanto and Roy Allan Martines. Among his credits are ‘Stones,’ ‘Wetworks,’ ‘Grifter,’ ‘Wolverine,’ ‘X-Force,’ ‘Fantastic Four,’ and many others. He has also written and drawn ‘Timawa’ for Alamat Comics, ‘Johnny Balbona’ and ‘Lastikman’ for Mango Comics short stories for ‘Siglo: Freedom’ and ‘Siglo: Passion’ and his latest creation ‘Elmer.’
Gerry Alanguilan wrote Wasted during the most turbulent days of his life. During that time, his girlfriend did not fully understood what he was doing and she preferred the architecture stuff than komiks. Eventually, the two of them opt to choose different paths to take and he was left devastated. Also at that time, the late Nail Pozner, an editor, gave him a tests script of Green Lantern to draw. But he mess it up and his work was rejected.

Based on Soledad Reyes’ essay on komiks, I think Gerry Alanguilan did a pretty good job in Wasted, confronting with the aesthetics and functions of the Filipino komiks.
Having read it countless times, still experiencing the feeling of reading it for the first time, it is undeniably entertaining and definitely provides a temporary relief of the unbearable monotony of oppressiveness of life. With the rough and violent images of killing politicians, preachers, deviant citizens and gays due to a mere expression of anger (nothing extra-judicial or potitical), it is definitely a deviance in the monotony of life and finally something was doen to the oppressor.
What Eric did the preacher, the politician, the gays, the man smoking in the jeepney and even to his own body were only manifestations that our emotions have limits. There will come a time when we have to release our deeply suppressed emotions—such as anger, hostility and hatred—without inflicting something to the society. But this time Eric did affect the society.
I think the question of whether it provides a site where the battle of good and evil are played systematically with the forces of light eventually gaining victory over the dark forces is irrelevant in this certain story. What is significant in this story is not what is evil or what is good, but Eric has become and what has made him become that way. If he is the evil persona, what is no significant is him going to jail for killing to jail for killing those people, but what is he willing to risk in order to win back the heart of the one he loves.
Does it foster national language? Practically, it does not because of the use of a foreign language, which is English. However, there is something very Filipino to the story. It could be in the plot or the tone of the writer. It could also be in the images that Gerry Alanguilan has created or the characters like the preacher, the gays, the politician or any of them.

Until now there is still an unending debate on how to interpret literature. Whether to look at it at a piece of art and interpret it for art’s sake alone, or to put it into context and look at the social implications and relevance. But, do we have to make a choice between the two?
For this part, I will start with the latter. In reading the story, I noticed something very ‘feminist’ in the plot. This time it is the girl who leaves the guy and went with another guy. It is justified enough to say that what happened to the male persona was caused entirely by the female persona. In this story, it is no longer the female that is subordinate to the male specie. Although, I can’t see indications that in that particular society there is an established equality between both genders.
Eric was devastated when Jenny left him. He resorted to different forms of violence just to express his anger, fury and rage. All that he was asking for was Jenny to come back to his life.
In interpreting the story as art in itself, it is irrelevant to ask the question on whether Eric’s persona is good or evil. Gerry Alanguilan made Eric that way because that was how he wanted Eric to be. Eric does not represent any oppressive figure in the society or any person that Alanguilan wants to popularize.
As a whole, everything in the story including the graphics has to be there not because have special roles, but because they are part of the story that is a sheer creation of the artist’s mind. Wasted does not advocate any theory or perspective. It is a form of art based on the taste of it creator.

What I like most about wasted is the “humanness” of the story. Anger is defined as a strong feeling of displeasure of antagonism. Anger is something that is very human and an inevitable condition of the human life. People experience anger in the most complicated or most mundane situations in life.
Ever experienced encoding your ten-page term paper that is due the next day and before you finished the last page there’s a sudden power interruption, and the saddest part is that you forgot to save what you have encoded? In just a second, everything is gone. Then, you suddenly felt an upsurge of emotion and you would want to immediately crush the monitor in front of you. Now, that is anger!
Anger confronts us everyday in our lives and we have different way to cope up with it. In Eric’s case, he has a very extreme way in dealing with anger, which I actually like. If you happen to come across Eric’s way and unfortunately you annoyed him and he finds you very irritating, he just points a gun on you and in just a second—you’re gone.
The urge to kill is basically part of the human instincts. (Although, there is a moral or ethical question attached to it.) There are just certain situations in life that we want some people to just vanish instantly from this planet. I think humans resort to killing because it is probably the fastest way to get rid of the problem. That person might be the direct cause of your miseries or otherwise: He or she could be one of your political adversaries. Or she could be your nagging landlady. Or that person who sits right next to you in a restaurant and annoys you every time he or she tries to eavesdrop at you conversation with your date.
There are just certain situations in the story that you would find yourself in the character of Eric and eventually thanking him for responding in such a way that you would want to, but just could not do. There is a certain Eric in each one of us, and that I find very interesting.
Another very interesting theme in the story is what Eric has become because of love. Love is aid to be the most complicated emotion (if it such) humans could experience and it is beyond human comprehension. In Eric and every person’s case, love could either bring out the best or worst in them.
Eric loved Jenny so much. He was happy and contented with her. Jenny loved him too, but she found another guy who could make her happy aside from Eric. Eventually, Jenny broke up with him. Eric’s life was a mess when Jenny left him.
This is a painful fact of life. We fall in love so desperately to persons who will love us, but eventually fall out of love for us. We have no choice but move on, but moving on takes so much time and courage. It takes so much courage to finally say to yourself that you are no longer meant for that person.
For Eric, love made him appreciate the simple details of life. Love made him experience the best and worst things in life. Love made him do things that he never thought he could do. Love made his smile despite of the unpleasant things that are happening around him love made him want to share every beautiful thing in this planet with Jenny. Love made him human.

Wasted is the type of graphic novel that is best to read at 1 o’clock in the morning, when you have tons of things to do and sleeping is never an option. The images in this book—blood spilling out from bodies, perfectly detailed gunshots, bodies falling from buildings, bodies lying in the floor bathed with blood, bodies exploding form glass windows—will definitely awaken your senses. At the end of the story, the reader would not hate Eric despite of it.

Violence, in this case, is very entertaining. But remember—for mature readers only.

It's corny, but who cares?

And look what I've got for all hopeless romantic people and those in their 'short-term nirvana'...



Am I one of them?

I'd Rather

(why am i into this agian
but i'd rather be here
than anywhere else)

This sorrow is killing me

When i see the pages
of my book yellowing in your shelf

Read to me the words
we used to utter while
waiting for heat to reach
our skin

Rage

if you must

Fury

if you must

Passion

when our bodies compel
to collide

( i know this won't last

but i don't care)

Poetry in Twilight

Join us in celebrating the diversity of life through poetry...

The search is on...

PINK IS IN!

GEN XY is here to make life more colorful!

World Environment Day 2006

On 5 June, a number of concerned Sillimanian students and environmental youth advocates celebrated, with citizens from around the world, the World Environment Day 2006 with the theme: Don't Desert Drylands!

View full article.

World Population Day

Join us in the observance of the World Pupolation Day with the theme "Counting the Youth Towards a Positive Change." There will be a program at 5 p.m. on July 11, 2006 at the Amphitheater, Silliman University. See you there!

This project is also made possible by the Austrian Foundation for World Population and International Cooperation.

Check this out!

Another "Brokeback"?

Hicks Wins AI!

It's the cloned Clooney and Leno over "Ms. USA". "Thank you America! I'm living the American Dream," screamed Hicks at the end of the show.



[photos via Yahoo! ]

Lakeside Wandering

Lake Balanan in Siaton, Oriental Negros

A freshwater lake in the forested mountains of southern Negros, with a shape resembling a figure of eight, the narrowest point between the two main portions of the lake being only 90 metres wide. The lake is surrounded by mountain ranges, and is fed by three streams, two of which rise on Lamaraw Mountain and the third on Anupugan Mountain.

Mcpheever!

Katharine is destined to become a great singer and she's simply stunning. However, I'm kinda worried with her last song (but it's not her fault) and Simon's shameless declaration of Taylor's victory. Nevertheless, Kat has proven her worth in this vocal olympics. She's an American Idol, no need to argue about that! Let's wait for the results tomorrow...

Seatrip part 2

At the PG Diver's Resort in Lilo-an, Santander, Cebu...

Seatrip part 1

From the Silliman Beach in Dumaguete City, I took a 1 and a half boat ride to Sandbar in Bais. The sandbar emerges from the earth's surface during low tide.It was high tide, so there was no show of the white sand...but it was all worth it. The prestine waters was more then a treat.

Right or Respect?

"Ang paninindigan ay walang kinikilalang okasyon o pagdiriwang"
-MariaTtheresa Pangilinan, Cavite State University


After all these hullabaloos about Teresa Pangilinan’s face-to-face protest to the President during their commencement exercise at the Cavite State University and this "lunatic injustice secretary" ordering an investigation, I think it’s my turn to share my thoughts about this issue. I personally admire Teresa for her courage to speak out what she believes which I think every single youth should have.
More than the controversies and the arguments raised by Teresa and her group’s act of courage, I think we should look at this as a catalyst that will stir the youth’s interest to get involved in issues confronting our public officials.
And this is her effect to me—my first post about something with a political root, which is not a usual occurrence. This is Teresa’s effect to me—and we need others like her and me.

Para kay h...

pepe at stewart


ang kaibigan kong si pepe
na lumalabas lamang tuwing gabi

dala ni pepe ang kanyang guitara
ngunit hindi niya alam kung
magagwa pa niyang tumugtog

pilit niyang inaalala ang mga awiting
nagbigay usok sa mga gabing mapusok

ang kaibigan kong si pepe
na may kaibigang si stewart
na lumalabas lamang tuwing gabi

si stewart na maliit
si stewart na maitim
si stewart na malihim

palagi nalang si stewart

palagi nalng lumalabas si stewart
tuwing gabi

nasaan na si pepe

bakit palagi nalang si stewart
ang lumalabas tuwing gabi

nasaan na si pepe

si pepe na ang kasama
ay ang kanyang guitara

si pepe na mahilg maghithit
ng sigarilyo kahit mainit

si pepe na naglalakad
pabalik sa dekada 70

palagi nalang si pepe

palagi nalang si pepe
na hindi na lumalbas tuwing gabi

After 6 months in the closet...it's out!

[At the Museo Vaticani mosaic art section, in front of St. Peter's Basilica]


‘Believe in the Supreme Being that is higher than all of us.’


INTERVIEW WITH MYRISH CADAPAN-ANTONIO, City Councilor(By Lyde Gerard S. Villanueva)

Q: Did you ever dream of entering politics?
A: No, it never came to my mind. It just came at a point when I was just too bored of (law) practice in Manila. I wanted to come home, and Ipe Remollo was then mayor and invited me to join his administration and his ticket for 2001. It was a way for me to find out whether this was the direction God wanted me to take.

Q: You topped the list of councilors during that election. How would you explain this?
A: I don’t know, honestly…I remember the mechanism of the campaign was patterned after my experience (as president) of the SU Student Government. I organized a group of friends who wanted to help me campaign. From that organization we invited others to join, so we had a small core group. I cannot explain, maybe you can ask some of my friends why that is so. When people interviewed me after the counting was done, they would say that maybe it was because I was a young person, a woman and a lawyer. Maybe somehow it was not ordinary in Dumaguete to have, modesty aside, someone with those qualifications. There was probably some mass appeal, they would say.

Q: Maybe you have charisma?
A: Maybe. Or maybe because of the long years I spent in broadcasting, 12 years with what used to be the only FM station in Dumaguete—DYEM FM (Love Radio). When I started I was only a high school student. It was the only FM station here, so it was the only station listened to. I also remember that I would be invited by the barangays to emcee, like Ms. Piapi or Ms. whatever, with no fee. So maybe these little things that you do in the past will probably help you sometime in the future.

Q: As a young politician, what challenges did you encounter?
A: The first term was indeed much of a challenge. I was part of the opposition. I was the only lady councilor. Most of my proposed ordinances were killed on first reading. Some were killed on second reading. Some on third reading. Among the 15, I think, ordinances that I proposed, only four passed during my first term. And then, of course, you have the discrimination issue…you feel that if you’re the only woman councilor. Men will always say that gender is not an issue. They always ask why do I always sponsor an ordinance on women? Why don’t I include the men in the ordinance? Why should women be treated special? So, it’s still difficult.

Q: How did you overcome those challenges?
A: It took a long time to overcome. But I had several people who served as my anchor, who lifted my spirit: Primarily my husband, who always tells me that even if it is not a popular decision, if it is the decision you think is right, then you can stand by it. I learned to accept that my role in the Council might not probably be to pass ordinances but simply to be the voice of the people, to be a concerned and vigilant opposition who would speak against certain decisions that do not favor the people and who will stand up for people’s rights and welfare.

Q: What is your priority as a legislator?
A: My priority is women, legislation on women and children. Good governance and probably raising the level of the Council to a more intelligent body.

Q: What has been your greatest contribution in the City Council so far?
A: My greatest contribution would be opening the eyes of the mayor and my fellow councilors to certain issues, to certain angles of certain issues they may not see but that I see because I’m in the opposition. Secondly, my being a city councilor has raised the regard of men for women, meaning to say, it has leveled the playing field for women in politics, although I’m a minority. And thirdly, it also shows that it is possible to win in an election now without having to buy votes.

Q: Currently you are proposing an ordinance entitled eServices Ordinance of Dumaguete. Can you explain what it is about?
A: The ordinance creates the eServices Council which seeks to promote the growing demand for information technology and services in Dumaguete. I’m sure you are aware of the coming in of several call centers that would like to venture in Dumaguete City. The ordinance would provide a venue for the City to look into the acceptability of which ventures, how they would benefit Dumaguete, as well as creating a council to review the activities in the call centers so that we can expand employment opportunities at the same time that the universities can tailor their programs parallel to these opportunities. (Note: the ordinance was passed by a unanimous vote of the City Council in October 2005.)

Q: Do you plan to run for higher office?
A: Not in the near future. I’m leaving for my Masters in Law.

Q: How did you meet your husband and what was your first impression of him?
A: We met in the Student Government. He was Graduate School representative and I was the representative of the College of Business Administration. He was somebody who appeared to be know-it-all, who insisted on his convictions and always stood by what he believed was right. I hated him. (Laughs)

Q: Why?
A: He always had different views from mine and he seemed to purposely do it. You know, to challenge me, and I could not understand him.

Q: Describe your first date.
A: (Laughs) Our first date? I couldn’t remember because I think we were together in the SURE party for like eight years. Throughout my college and law school years we were elders of the SURE party and I was his campaign manager when he ran for president. So it simply metamorphosed, I should say, into a more serious relationship.

Q: Being a mother of two kids, how has it changed your life?
A: A lot. The decision I now make have to consider my kids and my husband. Certain opportunities I let pass because I don’t want to be away from home too much. There are times when I shorten my working hours or I choose my clients so I can spend more time with the babies. Challenges…most of the family finances go to expenditure for medicine. My kids are hemophiliacs, so we learn to balance whatever resources we have for the kids. When I was single, I would go shopping for my own, now I’d go shopping for them first.

Q: Are you a hands-on mother, or do you have yayas to take care of your children?
A: I have yayas because I work, but I try my best to be there when I have the time. I’m both: I’m a hands-on mother because I leave for several hours only; I have yayas because my babies are very sensitive and they need extra care.

Q: How do you manage your time?
A: As they say, if you want something taken care of, you go to a busy person. It is simply time management and knowing which aspect of your life you value most.

Q: What is the best part of being a mother?
A: When you are able to transfer God’s power to procreate, to see what kind of children you can then procreate, to participate in the molding of future citizens of the world and to hear your children call you mom.

Q: What do you do during free time?
A: I have so much free time. My free time I spend with my kids and when they are asleep, I spend it with my husband. I love reading more than watching television. I also love surfing the net for new information. I love watching movies. My husband and I love to go around to while and time away and to talk. It is important for us to have time together.

Q: What was the highest point in your student life?
A: Probably when I became TOSP (Ten Outstanding Students of the Philippines 1995). Admittedly, it is the highest award that can be given to any Filipino student. So for me, it was the apex of everything that I did as a student to be recognized as such.

Q: How did you balance being president of the SG and your studies?
A: I enjoyed my SG days as if it were not a burden. I made it a point, you know, I just told myself I wanted to enjoy. I’m an ordinary person. I do not see myself as very intelligent or very gifted. I think I just know how to use the talents God has given me. I made it a point to develop myself holistically, the way the Silliman education provides us. I took a course where I could enjoy myself (Political Science) and excel. And the SG was somewhat a home for me. It wasn’t difficult as I recall because when you are young, you know, you’re vibrant and you have all the energy. You don’t get tired just like now. We would go home at 2 o’clock in the morning and we would go to class in the morning. It was fun! I remember it as one of the best periods of my life.

Q: Favorite word?
A: Beautiful

Q: Latest movie that made you cry?
A: I remember just one, Summer Spring. But it was a long time ago. I can’t remember crying in any other movie now.

Q: Most unforgettable journey?
A: Oh! Paris!

Q: If love had a name, what would it be?
A: If love had a name what would it be? JOJO!

Q: Greatest gift from God?
A: Free will

Q: If God gave you the power to solve the problems in our country today, what would you solve first?
A: Poverty!

Q: If God would give you one more talent, what would you want to have?
A: Singing! (Laughs) I know how to dance, so singing!

Q: If I opened your heart right now, what would I see inside?
A: My twins!

Q: Favorite book?
A: The Greatest Salesman in the World

Q: Rank the following (1-highest, 3-lowest): sex, love, money
A: 1. love, 2. money, 3. sex (laughs)

Q: If sex is food, what would it be?
A: Oh! Blueberry cheese cake (laughs)

Q: How would you want to be remembered?
A: I’d like to be remembered as a committed public servant, a wonderful mother and a fulfilling partner in life.

Q: As a young achiever, what is your message to the youth?
A: I think that young people should enjoy as much as they can. Do well in their studies so that whatever opportunities come their way will be met with success. As much as they believe in what they can do, they should believe in the Supreme Being that is higher than all of us. And they should be role models of the future.

[Published in the digital sillimanian]

Summer destination!

Bais is an hour drive from the Dumaguete City and a 30 minute boat ride to the pristine sandbar. The sandbar emerges from the earth's surface during low tide. The powdery white sand and turquoise blue water of this small island will surely take your breath away.

Sandbar! Here I come!

[photo by Butch Jimenez]

I love myself...(with my sister)

Cholo ikaw ba yan?

Kwong Sang Woo is one of Korea's hottest male celebrities. One of his TV series that was shown here in the Philippines is Stairway to Heaven.

ponder on pablo!

"Though this be the last pain that she makes me suffer
and these the last verses that I write for her."


----Pablo Neruda










*title of painting is Passion's Pain

new shades...

I broke my shades yesterday... Here's the replacement...
with David Beckham... Sexy shades...

wet men...

Hayden
George
Tom
Orlando

Not a bad idea...

I just received an e-mail from Sir Ian asking me and some of his students before to join in this year's Dumaguete National Writers Workhop.
Still thinking about it...

for S,

How I wish I knew how to quit you...

Pain is my middle name...

Reaping Pain in Winter

Remember Cafe Amber, and our first order
of brewed coffee and chocolate cake.
We savored every drop of coffee

like it was the sweat of our desire.
I felt the chocolate crawling inside
my mouth as your lips touch my nape.

Recall the lines from your favorite poems
and how we made love through words.
The rhythm from my tongue caresses your

innocence that lay in the whiteness of my pillow.
Your moan resonates in the room
like rhymes from your intensity to my gravity.

"But the leaves
have abandoned the trees."

Lines from the last poem you read
to me three years have passed.
Both of us adored Danton's poems.
You said, "It is not everyday that
we encounter such fine poems
and visions of love."

We found reality in his poetry.
And you left, as the leaves fall
from the boughs of my tree.

The tree survived winter, alone.

I found you in this room, white as snow.
Memories of how innocent you were
when we first met linger on my mind
and of how my coffee stained you.
Why do I always fall for young boys?

Cancer brought you here.

The cruelty of destiny flows from
your four chambers to my blood streams.
I can't stop the deluge with my
clammy hands. Only tears are groping
for hope, that one day you will read
to me again the passage of our
forbidden affair.

The most irresistible love
is the love you can't have.

Felicitations for Felicity!

The movie one should not miss! This movie will move the viewers into a higher level of understanding the diversity of human sexuality. Felicity's acting is sincere, superb and subtle. Hope she'll take home an Oscar.

He didn't...

Unfortunately, David sang his last song on Idol last night, but I still believe in his talent.
Simon is definitely wrong when he said that David has no charm! Look at his smile!

My Top 5 This Season

Elliot Yamin
Ace Young
David Radford
Paris Bennet
Catherine McPhee

no reply...

i have decided to...


Summer's thunder
lighting up the sky
oh heat thick
as desire

Then suddenly the rain:
finally falling,
falling everywhere:
to let go, then,
to let go and to move on,
is the way it seems
to be. Bang the brum, baby.

--Danton Remoto

but...

Two thumbs up!

She knows what to wear!

Another highlight...

She's got one on the way...

This Year's Highlight...

The winners are...

Record of the Year
--Bouolevard Of Broken Dreams
Green Day

Album of the Year
--How To Dismantle An Atomic
U2

Song of the Year
--Sometimes You Can't Make It On Your Own
U2
(U2 alos won 3 more awards)

New Artist of the Year
John Legend

Mariah Carey
--Best Female R&B Vocal Performance
--Best R&B Song (We Belong Together)
--Best Contemporary Album (The Emancipation of Mimi)


John Legend
3 awards


Kelly Clarkson
--Best Female Pop Vocal
--Best Pop Vocal Album

Brokeback manic...

I just can't wait to see Brokeback Mountain...

"Love is a force of nature."

from him...

Never lament on lost love,
my ally of the pen.
We no longer live in shame
on expression and
expression is our submission.
There's never a wasted ink
on poetry,
(my ally of the pen).
Your fantasy to taste the urgency
drove the sanity for
illusions. What you wrote
is also alive, breathing of
truth from fiction
It is a manic madness
to be seen as a fool.
The way you call it a talent
of sucking dry the
juices of glorified passion.

Am I?

I am yesterday's dust in the window
that tonight's rain washed away.

I am the gecko in the street lamp
chanting and hoping to cling on one's arm.

I am the tasteless bubble gum in your shoe
that went with you through the rough roads.

I am the deformed coin you dropped
in the wishing well while uttering your desire.

I am the last line of the song you heard
when you went out of the taxi.

I was the one who bruised
your chest but had the scar.

Yesterday, a high school student approached me and said, "After reading your poem, I told my mom that I want to make this world a better place to live in, especially for those who are being persecuted and ostracized." I didn't know what to tell him. It took a while before I replied and said, "I also felt that way after reading Ladlad."

Allow me to thank everyone who made my little success possible...

First of all, to the Almighty Father for giving me strength, knowledge and wisdom. To mama and papa, thank you for understanding and loving your prodigal son. To Vincent, Nicole, Justin and the rest of the family, thank you for the support (however begrudgingly). To my three beautiful "sisters," Lorraine, Marianne, and Carla, thank you for making my college life exciting and fun! To Durgy, thank you for the trust and the encouragement. To my Masscom friends: Galee, Claire, Ken, Das, Donna, Candace, Ray and the rest of the gang, thank you for laughing at my jokes. To my Agape family, thank you for guiding me when I go astray. To my pals whom I haven't seen for along time: Christine, Honey, Brenda, Joy, June, Yangan and Neil, thank you for believing in what I can do (and I did). To Rose Jean, thank you for listening to my stories (I'm sorry I wasn't there when I know you needed me).

For GEN XY, we can get through this...

I would also like to thank my literary influences: Nick Joaquin, Krip Yuson, Sawi Aquino, Gemino Abad, Danton Remoto, J. Neil Garcia, Bobby Flores-Villasis, Ernesto Superal Yee, Angelo Saurez, Ian Casocot and Niccolo Vitug. Without your works I would not know how to write a poem.

Finally, for S, they said, "What we have lost may never be returned to us." I don't believe them...

About that high school student, that didn't really happen...

My winning piece...

3rd Place
STRAW Month Poetry Writing Contest
January 24, 2006

Trilogy of the Lost Lamb

i
Her lisome body floats in the midnight
sky. Raiding every borough they might
have been. She found him in the tabernacle,
lying in bed; reckoning the fury
of their idle talks. He should have spoken.

The night they spent at the newest pub
in town could have been the night
when the lost lamb was found.

ii
Two unknown paths swerving in the woods.
One should only take one. Only a fool
can do both. Serpents and pests await
the brave one. The true test of valor
is faith--not the absence of fear.

One road leads to the lost lamb
while the other could
make one the lost lamb.

iii
In this theater of war he will inhume
the remnants if his life--his bawdy
rituals and unheathly games. Memory
will remember this ceremony.
He's new, no swords only words.

He utters words that can save
her and her lisomeness
and the lamb in the wilderness.

FREE TO BE ME

Quotes a gay can live by...

"The Bible contains six admonishments to homosexuals and 362 admonishments to heterosexuals. That doesn't mean that God doesn't love heterosexual. It's just that they need more supervision."

----Lynn Lavner

"Homosexuality is God's way of insuring that the truly gifted aren't burdened with children."

----Anonymous

"I don't think homosexuality is a choice. Society forces you to think that it's a choice, but in fact, it's in one's nature. The choice is whether one expresses one's nature truthfuly or spends the rest of one's life lying about it."

----Marlo Thomas

"Homosexuality in Russia is a crime and the punishment is seven years in prison, locked up with other men. There is a three year waiting list."

---Yakov Smirnoff

"A government that would deny a gay man the right to bridal registry is a fascist state."

----Margaret Cho

"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it."

----Oscar Wilde

Nobody saw him coming.

(Nights
when all I have
were just memories
of past love
that bruised my innocent
pleasure)

Nobody saw me grieving.

(Nights
when all I did
was crying
over a young love
that gave life
to my future)

Nobody saw him leaving.

(Nights
when you quenched
my insatiable
thirst for your
skin, sweat
and sin)

Nobody saw him eavesdropping.
He just left teardrops.

(for N)